Saturday, July 30, 2005

Still Alive

Still alive after last night yo? The morning was a bit of a wash though. Oh well . . .

So I bought 2 Lacoste shirts this week. Actually I didn't have to pay for one of them cause I was returning clothes I received as a present in exchange for the shirt. (I mean who wears shorts with pleats?, please.)

Anywayz, I bought one yellow and one white. As it turns out these are the exact same colors I bought my Grandad and Dad for father's day. Worst of all, I didn't realize it, until someone pointed this fact out to me. It must have been some weird unconious thing, or maybe not.

All right so this was the most pointless post ever. I'll work harder next time.

Still Blogging Bitches!

That is right I'm still blogging! I could do this shit all night long! I don't know if I'm ever gonna stop. Someone better call Guiness World Book of Records cause I'm gonna blog this shit all weekend.

Hmmmm, I love you filthy bitches. You just want to read whatever I put down on on this fucker.

Fucking A'!

Time to finish my drink and watch the rest of Roger Doger.


Blogging Under the Influence Bitches!

Yeah, I was out tonight. It was a good time.

Sunday, July 24, 2005

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Rennie says "Ride your bike bitch!"

So I've ridden my bike 3 of the last four days . . . all to get ready for the Thursday night crit. I've even been thinking of shaving the legs. You know you love it.

Where do I find my inspiration? Well, I have a picture I have of K. Reenie (a cycling friend of mine) making some strange face at the camera and above it I put a post saying, Rennie says "Ride your bike bitch!" I posted this on the door of my bike room. (yes I have room in my condo specifically for bikes, I suggest you should buy some bikes and get one too.)

Strange? Indeed. Inspiring? Absolutely.

Cyclo-cross season is nearly upon us!

Saturday, July 16, 2005

Eek Eek Eek, I'm a Cat. 5 squirrel

So I decided to go to the Thursday night Criterium ride in Great Valley Corporate Center this week. HA! It was not the return to greatness that I had invisioned in my mind.

I get there right around 6pm so the thing just started. I do a few warm up laps and try to hop on the back of the pack. My dumb ass tried to hop on when there was a break. Those doods where moving. I get dropped almost instantaneously but not before I realize that I completely forget how to really ride a bike. So I do another warm up lap and try to hop on the back again.

This time I find some inspiration. I see Huricanne Bob in the rear working hard. I hop on his wheel. I get to one of the turns. I see everyone pedaling through it. I must really suck cause I can't pedal through it. Despite my complete lack of handling ability I manage to hang onto the group for 5 laps. At one point I realized I am leaning the wrong way at the turns. Yeah, I am a Cat 5. squirrel. Bob made some joke about me being Cat 9. He maybe right.

I drop out the back. Do a few warm up laps and and then hop back on for another 5 laps.

In the end it was more than I could have expected out of myself having not ridden seriously for months. But what I didn't realize was how much I really missed going to it. Even though I only loosely know a few doods there, I have a great time just riding. This of course is all to reach a goal of cyclo-cross racing in the fall. I am going to try and ride 2 hours today.

Monday, July 11, 2005

O.J. is good for you, but how about your car?

Ahhh, First day at work! It was great.

Just to add some back story to this story. You need to know that I currently drive a 1997 Forrest Green Escort Wagon with 103k miles. Now, recently the car had to pass inspection. Normally this ain't a big deal, but this time I had to pay nearly a grand to get the peice of shit to pass inspection. Made me want to light the car on fire. This was about 2 weeks from today . . .

So I go grocery shopping today, and pick up some food. Mostly breakfast food (orange juice) and some lunch food. I throw my food in the back of the car. I drive 3 minutes to my condo and get groceries out of the car. As I'm walking to the door, I notice there is water dripping on my hands and feet. I didn't buy anything frozen that could be melting. WTF is going on here? I give my hand the smell test. hmmm. Smells kind of sweet. I give it the lick test. Kind of tastes like O.J.

Wait a second, I bought O.J.!!!! I put down the groceries, and pick up an empty O.J. carton from the plactic bag. A stream a curse words leave my mouth as I run back to my car to find a pool O.J. in the back seat.

Apparently, in throwing the food in the back seat, the O.J. carton landed on my ice scraper that poked a hole in the bottom of the carton. In 3 minutes the whole 1/2 gallon emptied onto my back car seat.

Needless to say, I was kind of pissed. I used whatever capret cleaner and paper towels I had left to clean up the mess. Hopefully, It won't smell that bad as I drive to work in the morning.

This can only make the car more attractive to the ladies. Am I wrong?

Monday, July 04, 2005

Happy 4th of July

There is a fire cracker in my pants just for you!

Saturday, July 02, 2005

Hello Ladies?

Well, last night could have been boring but I decided to make it a little interesting. . . .

First the back story. . . when I get bored at a bar I will occasionaly turn to Bubba or whomever happens to be at the bar with me and ask, "hey, you want to make out later?" This usually gets some breif laughs. anyways . . .

I was hanging out at the Boathouse with Bubba, Kyle, and Kyle's woman. Kyle's woman is sitting on his lap, and Bubba is sitting next to them. I am standing for no good reason, when some random skinny dood sits down next to Kyle's woman and introduces himself to everybody.

We had noticed this dood earlier as he was hanging out with several ladies from "Q Jersey" (that was not my saying, they told the D.J. they were from "Q Jersey".) This of course only reiterates every suspicion I had about New Jersey. But I digress . . .

Well, this dood, introduces himself and we talk to him for a bit, despite the weirdness of the situation. (I mean he left ladies to talk to 3 doods and 1 lady who was sitting on a dood's lap. In my book, that counts as weird.) So we get the first uncomfortable silence. This when I seize my opportunity to see what this guy is made of. I slap Bubba on the shoulder to wake him up, cause I don't want him to miss this.

I turn to our new friend and ask, "Hey, you want to make out later?" He has no idea what to say for about 5 seconds and then weakly replys, "No, not really." To which I reply, "Are you sure?" He says "yeah." At this point, beer is almost spilling out of the noses of Bubba, Kyle, and his woman. There is more uncomfortable silence because if anyone opens their mouth, Beer is gonna spill from laughing too much. He just continues to sit there with this glazed look on his face. I have to walk away, because I'm about to fall on the ground laughing.

To my surprise when I return he is still sitting there! I talk to him a little more and eventually he gets up and leaves never to return.

It certainly made the 11 o'clock highlight film for the evening. We later returned to the land of West Chester to see "The Bean" at 15 North.